MINI ONE

She’s the ONE for me.

Have you ever been lucky enough to have dated three gorgeous sisters? Salivate at this prospect for a second or two. First up is a feisty, rocker chick on speed. Beautiful and fire-breathing at the same time. Think Monica Bellucci and Courtney Love rolled into one and there you have her. Every time you see her, she is begging you to ride her – hard.
With her, there never is a second to spare, as every moment counts. Great, except that in no time, you’re tired out and wondering whether you have satisfied her at all. She barely misses you as you leave her dancing the night away at the club.

But no matter, because at home waiting is her babelicious – and alluring – second sister.

Sister two is 100% glam. She would definitely win a Miss Universe title if she bothered to enter. She is always dressed for the occasion and oozes confidence and sexuality. Men flock to her like bees to honey. When she speaks, men hang on to her every word, breathing in unison with her as she weaves a spell that makes other women wonder what the hell hit them as their men wander from their sides.

My problem is... can I really be with a woman who is the centre of attention all the time? Do I always have to call her in advance to match her wardrobe just in case I look like an absolute twat next to her? Can I live with this inferiority complex day in and day out?

Which leads me to sister number three. Think clichés. Bespectacled, quiet and purposeful, she’s the pretty librarian with a down-to-earth nature whose beauty is overshadowed by the overt attractions of her older siblings.

Yet being with her feels just right. She is tolerant with a forgiving nature that makes all those around her feel at ease, being equally at home nursing a teh tarik at a mamak stall or spending a night at the opera. Sister three is the sort you can take anywhere and do anything with – and not have to think too much about it.

Well, the Mini ONE is the third sister (and the others – are the S JCW and the Cabriolet, respectively). The ONE, was – pardon the pun – the one I most enjoyed driving.

It has the looks and the handling to match her more expensive sisters with none of the foibles attached to them. Equipped with one of the nicest 5-speed manual gearboxes I have used in recent memory, with short positive throws, she makes great use of the 90 bhp churned out by the 1.6 litre engine.

Under spec-ing the Mini ONE with thinner run flats has made it the most comfortable and quietest ride in the Mini range. On paper, the ONE should theoretically possess the least amount of grip, but I feel it’s actually a good thing. Instead of losing grip all of a sudden (a usual problem with bigger lower profiled tyres), the thinner tyres on the ONE loses grip progressively with its front wheels under-steering instead of the more violent snap over-steer when the limits of adhesion are reached.

Objectively speaking, the Mini still has a few flaws. Seats that don’t seem to be able to be adjusted right, tiny buttons, gimmicky instrument layout, super small boot, and lousy fuel consumption. Most other cars would be crucified for these flaws, but not the Mini. It somehow manages to send your attentions to what are right about it, so much so that you find yourself forgiving the car quite easily.

Most importantly, the Mini ONE reminded me why I love driving. So much so that I began, unconsciously, to take the longest routes to any destination, all the time enjoyed every minute of it.